2012 New Year's Resolutions

1. Become more articulate and betters at critical reasoning

Game plan: Bi-monthly debates with Dan.

2. Finish Rosetta Stone level 1 Spanish and move on to level 2!

Game plan: Sunday morning is my Rosetta Stone time

3. Going skins for Gay Pride

Game plan: 99 Challenge daily, by July

4. Take the GRE by fall

Game plan: Start studying in spring

5. Start my photography portfolio

Game plan: San Diego as my first photo shoot, by summer

6. Create a versatile wardrobe

Game plan: Layers and complimentary colors!

7. Move in with Dan

Game plan: Move in with Dan, duh!

8. Save up $730 by the end of the year

Game plan: Put away $2 a day.

9. Decorate my own apartment

Game plan: Check out rummage sales for DIY items

10. Host a bomb party!

Game plan: Start planning a party for the end of summer

11. Graduate, finally!!!

Game plan: Take the 20 units I need to take in spring to graduate

12. Become a social media wizard!

Game plan: Update my status, share things I find interesting, be more interactive

Here are my 2012 New Year's Resolutions! To track my progress I am going to do quarterly updates! Stay tune for my before picture. What would be neat is if you posted some of your 2012 New Year's Resolutions!

Constructive Criticism

A few things I'd like to work on:
Maturity level -> sometimes it's okay other times I am like whoa why did I just do that.

Saying what I want to say, In other words not 'running away' from a situation/conversation.

I want to be more aggressive, in general, less passive but I don't want to be too aggressive at the same time. Just enough to make playing against me interesting.

Last thing for right now, I want to find my flow. Like my style. Or maybe groove. I need a wardrobe change and an attitude adjustment.

It might be fun.
This sounds weird, reading it, but I always hear 18 - 21 year olds change a lot. Got to find something that works.

Something New

People of have a weird way of being able to heal each other.

One minute you're on the floor wishing for nothing more that you could be stone and nothing can seep through. Then just as instantly as the moment before you are wishing that you don't fuck up this moment so maybe you can have a chance at something new.

It strange how people need people.

----

Yesterday, me and a friend were talking about time and how seconds can feel like hours and hours could feel like minutes depending on the situation and anticipation.

I lost my train of thought.

-.-
-Rikki

Noises In My Head

It is currently very cold in my room, my skin feels foreign, bumps occupies its' surface. It feels tight and my scars are fainter. I hear my parents talking outside, despite everything it's some what comforting hearing my dad. I have been putting many things off, taxes, getting a new planner...

I just finished A Wolf At The Table. It was very good.

Right now I feel like my music has loss some of it's taste. I'm looking for something that is hard to find.
I'm happy, today was a good morning, despite being cold and having that awful morning taste in my mouth.
Work has been going well, I think I am learning a lot and I have found what I need to do, not need but want to do. I was floating around looking for something to anchor me and I think I've found it.

I don't think I am random...

Today I might ride my bike, I don't know yet.

Yesterday some one asked if I was interested in some special brownies, I answered no, but in my head I thought about it, I considered saying yes, but only in my head. The guy said if I ever change my mind let him know. He wants to be a principal some day.
The girl next to us told me I was a genius, I'm far from a genius, I am only intelligent cause I work hard, if I don't get something I figure it out, very few things I get instantly. But I said thanks and replied I just have a good work ethic.
The girl across the table kept on touching and invading my space. I don't think on purpose because the lab class room was cramp.

I started changing things I do in my life, I have a set of chopsticks in my car, just in case I go to a noodle house or sushi place. I have been refilling my water bottle instead of getting a new one, maybe next month I'll upgrade to a non disposable water bottle. I bring my own fork and spoon to school just in case I eat lunch there. Normally I bring my own lunch. I am both saving money and saving unnecessary waste. Even my shower habits are changing. I take shipshowers every other day. Meaning I get wet, turn off the water scrub and brush my teeth scrub my face and turn back on the water when I am ready to rinse.

I think I am just talking now to empty my head, I always feel like if I say or write something it leaves my head and opens up room for other things.

Well bye.

-Rikki

Odd =]

I had the strangest dream last night, it happened in sections, I don't remember the order, but one section of the dream was of a black lady in a light purple sundress, with her hair pulled back in a short ponytail, and her young daughter in a white sundress, covered with sunflowers, were under a blue BMW being dragged along in a prairie setting. The lady was screaming for the driver to stop, which he finally did the mother was no longer under the BMW and was crying as she crawled towards her daughter attempting CPR. As soon as she reached her daughter the unknown male driver ran over the mothers legs, snapping both her tibia and fibula. She screamed. The driver drove off. The dreams ends. I am watching this from the perspective that I am a viewer like someone watching t.v., I can not affect the outcome.

Next section was of me watching people from a hotel room, in the same prairie setting, run around in what look like huge shallow mucky lake. They were going unusually fast. This section stops, I don't recall what happens next. But the next section is the same beginning just this time someone is there, and I ask him why people are running through the mucky lakes, he replies cause it is like a sport, it's fun. Some guy walks pass our window and looks up at us through the window and winks. After that I woke up. To get ready for school.

Empty like the thrash bin I just threw out...

Yesterday I saw Venus, and it did nothing for me. I need to find myself, all I was, was conditional. And that's not fair, that's not who I want to be. Yea, I love my job, yea I love the people around me. But when I am in the solitude of my mind, I am lost.

Here's to 2009 and knowing more about what makes me go tic tic.

-Rikki

Birthday Boy

Hello!

Well it's that time of year. It's my birthday, I'm 20 now. Another year under my belt. =] I hope everyone has an amazing day today. =] It's also Thursday. My birthday promise to myself is to go through my New Year's Resolution list and complete at least 25% of what I decide needs to be on my list.

Good luck to me... =]

List:

Learn Spanish -.-
Learn to ride a motor bike.
Learn to type faster and correctly.
Learn how to make an origami elephant.
Get a fancy helicopter.
Play my guitar a whole lot more.
Learn to walk on my hands!
Find someone special and show them they are special.
Make at least 3 new friends.
Learn to Snow board.
Make a Snow Man.
Make a Snow Angel.
Go to a new city and ride the bus system.
Get an A in O-Chem.
Become a pro Ice Skater, well be able to do a jump is all I am looking for.
Read a book a month.
Study more effectively.
Get better at my job, learn about autism more.
Go scuba diving before the end of summer.
Fly Kites before February.
Make something cool and exciting.
Go to the Monterey Bay Aquarium.
Visit the Statue of Liberty.
Go to Alaska.
Ride in a Helicopter, or hot air balloon shaped like a panda bear.
Find a water fall.
Go to Mullahey.
Join another hip hop class.
Join a biking entourage.
No more than a soda a week. More More Water!
Learn to do a front flip.
Be a little more sensitive to others' feelings.
Write a letter and send it to someone, the postal service is nice.
Go see a concert of someone on my ipod.
Jump off something, and survive.
Parkour more.

Okay I think I am done with the Resolution List... =]

-Rikki Bower